Humint Events Online: Bush's Vision

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Bush's Vision

A couple posts back I was wondering exactly what sort of vision Bush had for the US.

Today I found out what his vision is:
Bush Vows To Eliminate U.S. Dependence On Oil By 4920.

WASHINGTON, DC—President Bush unveiled an aggressive initiative Monday that would make the U.S. free of petroleum dependence by the year 4920, less than three millennia from now.

"Our mission is clear," Bush said in a speech delivered at Fort Bragg in North Carolina. "We must free ourselves from dependence on fossil fuels within 85 generations. A cleaner, safer America is my vision. And it is our great, great—great-times-80 grandchildren who will realize that vision."
Responding to reporters' questions, Bush admitted that our progeny could face challenges in pursuit of the goal, such as the earth's degrading orbit and eventual destruction of the moon by tidal force, or the Second Coming of Jesus Christ.

"Our distant relations will have some hard work to do," Bush said. "But hard work is what built this nation, and I have every faith that they will succeed."

The proclamation comes on the heels of Bush's plans to pay off the national debt by the early 6300s, and win the war on terror by 7450.


Blogger Chronicles from the Panopticon said...

No... This can't be. This is REALLY awful. Bush is clearly stating that he'll launch all out wars on every soil that owns the least bit of oil by saying this.

Fossil fuels (oil & gas at least) are out of the game at best by 2020 (The cost of getting them out of there will be more than the energy produced by burning it). 85 generations fit between 2005 and 2020?

"The war the won't end in our lifetime" Cheney said, will be for those resources, and in the end it'll be for the remaining scraps...

4:33 PM  
Blogger Spooked said...

It's the Onion.

It's a joke.

7:53 PM  
Blogger Chronicles from the Panopticon said...

LOL. Aight, I bit the bait. I assumed you wouldn't post joke articles in here and got caught :P

6:12 AM  
Blogger Spooked said...

Sorry, I was just getting tired of all the doom and gloom sutff and wanted to put up something a little lighter.

11:05 AM  

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