Dear Media...

Oh splendorous media,

oh bounteous media,

oh merciful media,

oh great and all-powerful media,

in your infinite wisdom and all-encompassing knowledge,

could you please deign to explain
how in nine battleground states,
such as Ohio, Florida and Minnesota,
the vote tallies from these states favored Bush by an average of about 5% of the vote over the exit poll results?

Dr. Steven Freeman of the University of Pennsylvania has calculated that the odds of all these exit polls being off by such a wide margin are one in 250 million.

The exit polls suggested a Kerry landslide, while the real vote tally gave President Bush a narrow win.

Could you please explain this to your lowly, poor and ignorant subjects?

Thank you.

Your humble servant,

Spooked